Thursday, January 9, 2020

I dreampt of a church

While I was standing atop a hill. It was a Big brown cross and it was in front of me slightly to the left. The kind of church building where the cross is woven in.

I also was in a well furnished grey house. A home with lots of new furniture. Otttomans, and a woman who was light skinned. She was to my left. In front of me, to my right slightly, there was a man with a great big chest. He was black, and has a large chest. I saw the lightskinned woman was wearing a white shirt. I think there were more people, another woman specifically.

Then at some other point, I, or a woman, was driving a car down a car garage. It's like I'm going around the loop of my mind, a twist downward, and to the left or right. I'm not sure now. I'm sure it was a car garage.

Last night I might have gotten into some trouble. Let me tell you why, I talked bad about Reverend Brown in FRONT of the PASTOR, and his wife. I didn't mean to do that like that, and I even apologized afterwards. It just came out of me. I said they "challenged me" and that "God" Took them another direction. When they get back it will not be like that, I said. Where I got the heart to say this, I don't know.

Still, I taught Bible study also. I was even afraid afterwards, for the retribution of what I said. I don't think it was wrong, but I think it was something wrong about fronting them on stage. I could have kept that to myself and been just fine.

I won't do that again. I lead the Bible Study also. I got some of it on tape. I was glad to have the chance. I did ok. They said "Good job". I think also they are rooting for Reverend Brown. They want him to be the hero, the one, the winner. He looks the part. But it's my substance. What do I do Lord?

I remember seeing Reverend Brown do a speaking event flawless. Got out of the car, and went in there. He just went and spoke, and commanded the attention. He was used to the crowd. He is a good performer. This is why God Blessed him. He knows the show must go on.

So I have respect for him. But he must not challenge me. Those who challenge me have all been taught a lesson. Some people did not get hurt. I didn't get hurt, so I don't know why they'd be harmed. Yet, some were, in some fashion. Maybe not physical hurt, but they had to go out of the way. An inconvenience. Isn't it inconvenient to gank me? Don't you feel I'd want to taste some power too?

But you have to think also. What would I do? Would I do anything if I knew I had power? Would I not do anything? Imagine I wasn't here. Imagine life and nver having the juice spread out. No one getting it, no movies, no presidents, no bosses, no children. No teachers. No one getting the power. No latino. No one getting the power and spreading it around. No Markeesh. No Abraham. No Reverend Brown. No one doing any of that. No Snoop. No Dre. No one. No Ice Cuube. No one. All of it comes from me. No Tupac. No one.

Why did The Lord Do This? Why did he give one child so much power and autthority? To make it clear. To demonstrate, you must not think there is a face to power. There is no face, only acts. Who shall commit deeds is endowed indeed. Who shall say, "I will help" will be rewarded. Perhaps not in the same fashion, manner as I. For my deeds are rippling past generations now.

Having found the Lotus Sutra, I am immensely grateful. Yet, The Lord foundded this. Having created those who wrote it!

I am indebted to The Lord for His Blessing. I am a full grateful man. I have no other choice, or desire, than to serve The Lord with gladness, and supply Him with laughs. Perhaps I am a comedian after all, who has shared the stage of life with God for a long time. I have years to go, I hope, and may The Good Lord Bless me as I take the stage also. It is mine, and I have to work on it.

The stage is a laboratory. For 5 minutes. There are no other stagehands with me, so I must carry the message as clean as possible. I said "crisp" at the podium. I didn't mean to gank Eddie Griffin. But I did. I am no better than any other man. I apologize to Eddie Griffin also. I don't like to gank other men at all.

I like to be original. This is because Original doesn't run out. When you get low, you make more. You are original. No one else has your power commanded quite like you do. I love Brenda. This is eternal. I love her always, like hallways and furniture. I love this chair.

Can my gratitude be financed? Giftloop and SJ and Cat and even, well those are the three that pay. the other ones, let's see if they pay at all. I deleted giftloop before because I thought it deleted Paypal. I have a pet peeve briefly about White people or anyone not Black, not wanting me to win. Since I'm Black, I see there is a bias, and also a shortchange in almost all of society I know about.

I remember Deacon Paylor driving me to Brenda's house, and I stayed for 5 minutes. I was a fool. I can truly say. Lanicia was looking like an Indian Princess God woman, and I was acting stupid. Here they were trying to learn about me, and I was trying to get away because of something stupid. Lord, may they forgive me.

Lord.